I havent really felt like writting lately. Its sad. None of my thoughts are complete-none of my words sound correct when I put them on paper. Its like they hit a brick wall and stall. They just stop. I hate it. I wish my mind were clearer, I wish that I wasnt so lazy, or so irresponsible. I mean, while Im being irresponsible-Im having fun. Completely free, no worries and no cares. But after the fact, it all hits me like a ton of bricks. Ive worked ONE shift since being back in Florida. Ive been back a week now. One 80 dollar shift compared to the three week $300+ vaction I just took doesnt help! My car is f'd cause I dont have insurance, and I havent registered it yet. Its gonna cost me almost $800 bucks. my taxes are still due. lol. i sent in some money-but not enough, so thats another $800. then I owe ruth back money-almost 1000. So, 2600 not to mention the car payment of 80 bucks dues september 20.
Im so confused lately on how I feel about everything. I mean everything. Love, life, school, work. EVERYTHING. Im not sure what makes me happy anymore. Im not sure what gets me excited. In the love department-im stuck. just stuck, i cant seem to move forward. I dont know why. theres so many things i want from the past.